He’s the kind of guy that men want to be, and women want to be with. 

He could have been standing in line behind you at Home Depot when you were buying those cool new tools, or sitting next to you when you ordered a drink at the bar (instead of actually going home and using your new tools). Or while you were at the bar, he could have been entertaining your girlfriend, who you should have been entertaining rather than wasting time buying tools you don't know how to use then getting all liquored up.

We recommend wearing a shirt, some boxers and cooling your beverage in a coozie while asking everyone you meet, “Do you know Mike Oxbig?” 

P.S. Might be a good idea to get your girlfriend a shirt, too.